#so thats why its pretty simplistic

[straypaint]

OMG IJUST WOKE UP. ... UR PFP....ITS SO PRETTYY NFNJ

EHEHE TY BABY….

[writingpuddle]

just had to say, i loved your tags on that post about the upperclassmen and how they treat kevin/andrew/neil. fandom tends to work on this "they're all assholes" beliefs, and it's not necessarily untrue. but i think people tend to forget just how unlikeable kevin and andrew are from the upperclassmens perspective. i think people also forget the upperclassmen didn't just blindly love neil. for all his faults, like you said, he was pretty chill. he was much easier to get along with and it helped massively that unlike kevin/andrew he actually wanted to make a connection with the upperclassmen.

im glad my tags resonated with you! i have this half-cooked thesis that maybe one day i'll get around to fleshing out about the difference between individual responsibility and collective responsibility that i always think about when i see this conversation pop up--something about how yes, we as a society have a responsibility to people who have been harmed to try and help them recover, but that responsibility doesnt actually apply to every individual person. in this case, the idea that wymack founded the foxes (an institution) in order to help people move forward and build a future doesnt mean that every individual involved in the foxes has to invest all their energy in that same goal. in fact its pretty wild to expect every beneficiary of a service to simultaneously provide it to those around them.

the institution has to be be fair, has to provide help independent of some arbitrary category of 'deserving' but individuals...dont have to do that. every fox signed on to escape their own nightmare, not to help fix the other foxes. the upperclassmen have no responsibility to reach out to kevin and andrew when they have been so hostile in return. wymack has to, because he made a commitment to doing so. the upperclassmen didnt.

and as you said--the question of why the upperclassmen were nicer to neil is straightforwardly answered by he wasnt mean to them. he was sometimes unnecessarily blunt or rude (if we got what we deserved we wouldnt be foxes) but he was also the one who gave them awed compliments when he first started playing with them. he was the one who said we can win this. he was the one who shut kevin up when he started to be negative.

he was easy to like. part of that was intentional on his part--not that he was intentionally being likeable, but he was trying to portray himself to be less antagonistic than he really is. he tells us quite explicitly that he is portraying 'neil' to be meeker than his natural instincts, so he hangs out with the upperclassmen and is mostly at least neutral in terms of social hangouts and when it comes to exy he is extremely positive. and despite his occasional snaps at the upperclassmen, he actually rarely lashes out when its not deserved. his temper is reserved for riko and people who support him. kevin and andrew lash out at the upperclassmen in their own ways, and avoid them in many other circumstances, for reasons that are often obscure without neils insider knowledge. it isnt morally wrong to like someone who is easier to be around.

'why are they nicer to neil' because neil was nicer to them. thats how human interaction works. doesnt mean andrew and kevin didnt deserve help--but the person to provide that was the person who made a commitment to do it, not the people who just happened to be--effectively--their coworkers.

to sum up: everyone deserves human decency from everyone, but not everyone deserves friendship from everyone.

i guess--i dont want to get too antagonistic about this myself, because i actually doubt that many people have super simplistic views on this topic, theres just the occasional oversimplified post that gains a bit of traction. but i do think theres also a very fascinating tendency for people to try and make aftg into a neat didactic story about reaching out to people to understand them because neil reached out to andrew and it worked (and arguably saved both of them). but aftg isnt didactic. its not a prescription for how to behave. its made up. in real life, if i met andrew and it wasnt my job to help him, i would avoid him like the plague. sorry. i love him as a fictional character and i love him because i know his story but holy fuck i would not spend a minute in his company if i didnt have to.

friendship isnt social work. emotions arent activism. the upperclassmen didnt owe andrew and kevin their sympathy or their time just because they were traumatized. you cant control peoples emotional reactions to how they are treated. kevin and andrew treated them badly. neil largely didnt. thems, as they say, the breaks.

[catkin-morgs-kookaburralover]

hullo, i'm the anon who asked about good people to ask about christianity, which i've actually been meaning to ask for a while .

i have a lot of questions, i think, but ultimately my biggest question is Why?

unfortunately i know thats a pretty massive question to just dump on someone but as someone who once believed and does no longer, i would really like to know what spoke to you in this faith (i know this is also a highly individualized question so .)

hi anon! are you asking why Christianity exists or why I believe?

I believe in God because there cannot be a world without God. Sorry if this seems simplistic but that's literally my response. Evolution cannot happen. It cannot work. Chance cannot come up with people. From a midwife's perspective, there are enough things in birth that have to happen just exactly so that I don't believe it's possible for chance to have made it, or small little changes over time.

I believe in the God of the Bible because the Bible fits together. It makes sense. It's the only book of its kind to ever exist, spanning multiple centuries and writers. And the God who is shown in that Book is someone I want to worship. There's a line in one of the Narnia books that I consider to excellently sum it up: "He's not a tame Lion, but he's good." God is good and wise and just and kind. He created the heavens and the earth and yet he still listens to me. There are coincidences that aren't coincidences that have shaped my life.

On a personal note, I believe in God because I am. I've written about it before, but short summary, I was born three months premature. My mother had been sick all pregnancy. I had so many issues that I should not have survived; it was touch and go for months. My doctor has said multiple times that medically, I'm a miracle. I've seen a summary of medical issues from my first couple of years and I stared at it like what. I shouldn't have survived, but because of God I did. Also, I'm chronically suicidal and depressed. The only reason I haven't killed myself yet is because I know God is with me. "Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I shall fear no evil, for thou art with me, thy rod and thy staff, they comfort me."

And if God is for us, who can be against us!

[princess-of-the-corner]

This is just my take, https://www.tumblr.com/princess-of-the-corner/755414313197617152/yeah-thats-what-i-meant-about-tim-killing-joker?source=share

Tim can be rather interesting when looked at through a lens of "Willing to do a murder" but only if he's not self aware about it.

What I mean is, when Tim's introduced his whole thing is wanting to see Batman back on the straight and narrow. Tim by and large has an extremely rigid and inflexible morality that he didn't inherit from Batman but his own parents/society.

This is why he hates/hated Catwoman, she is a thief and therefore bad.

HOWEVER

Tim also would lose his shit and try to kill or aim to kill and in one scenario only avoided killing by technicality far more often than people realize. The thing is though the narrative and framing never really... Realize this.

Basically:

When Tim tries to kill someone its because he's feeling so much, and the situation is so hard and even if he did almost or maybe did kill someone it doesn't say anything about Tim!

In contrast when Stephanie tries to murder her abusive dad, and is indifferent to the possible death of a guy who tried to kill her & Tim with a chainsaw, that does reflect her morality. That means she's a problem!

Its a pretty consistent double standard that gets bandied around a lot and can be quite vexing. But as said, to me he interesting way to view it is basically that between say, Tim & Steph, she is actually the one with more control.

IE, she went out with plans to murder her father, he knows her identity and tried to kill her moments before. She could still be talked out of killing him & chilled out.

In contrast, & assuming I remember this right, pretty sure I do XD

Tim tried to kill someone who had killed a classmate he didn't even seem to like that much. Said shooter was in a messy situation and the guy shot had been threatening him before and even brought a gun to school before 'straight as an arrow' Tim told on him to to his father, Jack Drake. Tim had to be forcibly held back from killing him by Stephanie and Connor Hawke.

As before, Stephanie's intro has her framed as a anti hero at best. While Tim, even after like 12 months of Bat training and plenty of case experience almost loses his head over a too personal case and goes to murder.

So yeah, I can see Tim doing a murder, but only in the context of. Tim losing his temper or getting too personally involved in a case and basically having a "My murder is morally acceptable" mentality. While still refusing to see anyone else's nuanced experience.

Honestly, Tim's a fascinating character if one leans into how Tim was very much not cut out for the life he threw himself into.

Hence steadily becoming so bitter and broken and in a "Dark Future" becoming a gun wielding Batman.

While in contrast, characters like Stephanie & Cassandra are kind of used to overcoming horrible shit and so super hero work isn't notably worse than what they're already dealt with.

Or in other words, Tim comes from a place of privilege, both in universe and in the narrative.

This informs how he has a simplistic view of the world and why he fails to register his own hypocrisy or 'moral weaknesses' and why the narrative never recognizes it either.

Which all fed into him not handling it well when he those privilege's were steadily made redundant or simply not enough to compensate for hew new circumstances and challenges, causing his hard lines to waver far more easily than he or the story realize.

That's my take anyway.

makes sense!

[monstrouslyobsessed]

still working on a thing and ima try and throw up another concept or hc later today tomorrow~now ima answer some asks < 3

tw: n'sfw subjects, kink talks, pregnancy(-related) mentions

What blogs and writers(ones that do dark romance stuff) do you recommend? —anonymous

i get this question a lot tbh, i should think about adding to faq, but uhhhhh, depends on what you're looking for. original or fandom? most of my mutuals, friends, and writers i liked/found write genshin, jojo, and other popular fandoms.

if original works only, i haven't found many, no, and tumblr ain't great with their rec feed (99% time they're fandom only).

@dear-yandere (she's not active, but i love her works sm) made a post you can look through! linky link

Favorite kinks to write in your opinion? —anonymous

uhm, i'm sure you can tell with most of my works lol but ig i can explain why i like a certain few. rest tho, i just like them lol

pregnancy / pregnancy sex / oviposition, im actually a touch tokophobic irl, but in writing, its not so much on for children (they're cute though) but because it's the near-total loss of control over one's body, if that makes sense. as its my thing to write the darling losing control to their possessive spouse, pregnancy is one of my go to.

monster dick(s), because we could use some variety in our d's lol human d's is good too though ofc

stomach bulge / cumflation, p similar to pregnancy in some ways, the darling loses the sense of losing their body to the other. (pseudo?) body destruction, really.

size differences, because i want to be picked up and be carried sometimes

yeah, most of the kinks i listed here had to do with the loss of control.

YES I CAN U BACK DEAR 💕💕💕💕 —anonymous

that was painful;; so glad to be back!! 💕

Yoo have you seen the movie called the descent? If you have, what do u think of the monsters!! —anonymous

uhmmmm, the name didn't ring a bell...google time!

oh waittttt, i vaguely remembered this one. this was based on dante's inferno, wasnt it? after checking the monsters, yes hi.

i prefer they'd bathe first though lol but i'd be down for them! pretty simplistic in design, reminded me of buffy the vampire slayer's vampires, actually! think buffy was one of the earliest monsters i can remember really liking as a wee lad.

So, have you read the Neonomicon? I saw it on one of your posts. I actually read the thing online and I immediately fell in love with the Deep One too despite the noncon. Is that weird? —anonymous

are you referring to the one i did where the darling had to watch the world burn in the palm of cthulhu?

thats the only one i can recall of ever doing, but on reading the neonomicon, no! you're talking about the comic series one? i don't generally read american comics because of how weird they organized their issues, but if its not long and good, then i'll be happy to check it out!

and nah, not weird at all imo. humans are drawn to things we simply don't understand, and as long as you are not harming yourself or anyone else, its fine to indulge. we all find appeals in certain things others don't and that's perfectly normal. most of the monsters i liked as a kid were actually violent and murderous so.....yeah. im literally one of the last people who should judge you , dear nonnie.

just know that youre far from being alone though! heck you'll find many n'sfw artworks and other contents of the deep ones and other monsters if you know where to look.

Dude I've been binging all your pyramid head works and I love them sm!! Would u be writing more for him in the future? —anonymous

mmmaybe? like i do have a couple of ideas, but nothing too concrete. one idea involved the reader being, well, the mother of monsters and the butcher would probably become more monstrous over time because of the silent hill related plot reasons. thing is, the reader wouldn't know there were changes at all, being too addicted to the butcher's to pay attention. I'm being very vague on this one because...idk how to communicate the story yet, if at all.

the other one might involve incest though, because of the monsters the reader birthed cooperating with the butcher, under the god's order. this one is just...a concept more than anything though because tentacles are fun.

otherwise, its just straight pron with the butcher. I'm glad you liked him tho! &lt;3

now to work on things...inbox is always open tho~!

[ravio-rants]

2 for any, uhh I cannot remember what it is but..7 for any, cause it’s my lucky number :smiles:

Why does your oc look the way they do? What are your reasons for their appearance?

gonna answer this for most of them bc its fun lol

Raide is actually way different than they originally were designed. she used to be a sona, or, my sona (ravio)'s opposite twin thing. i didnt like that idea anymore so i revamped him completely, and ended up mashing together "skull pattern bc its cool" "keep her hair similar" and "colors i like" and ending up with what we have now. oh, her hair actually originally was designed after a spatoon oc i had, and then i Hated drawing the hair so much that i never drew him, so, with my siblings advice, i made them wear a crown that looks similar to his old hair, and her new hair still has similar vibes but is much easier to draw.

Calen actually hasnt changed too much, to be honest. he used to be just an offbrand version of a character i liked from a fandom im no longer in, and because i had already made him kinda my own, i kept him around and changed him into a twili to match Raide. his colors are blue and gold because thats what his colors originally were, and his skin is tinted green because i didnt want All my twili to just be black and white. thats boring.

Vang was the first of the twins to be made, and was also my first twili oc, so she kinda became the outline for them. Her and her brother, Kalt, are supposed to look like siblings, but also look closer to Midna from canon, because they are part of the royal lineage, and i wanted them to match more with the canon looks we are given for twili.

Kalt is vang but to the left, design wise, honestly. they probably looked Very similar, if not identical before she transitioned, but neither of them minds. he has the same hair as The Hero (link from twilight princess) because he looks up to him and wants to be cool. (aka he started as just a twili Link design but i made him my own.)

(all of the twili are actually undergoing mild design changes currently. undecided if some of the new design choices will be part of an au or not, so i wont be explaining them here, since they arent complete yet anyways.)

Hobic the wizard design choices? uh. slutty gay wizard with his tits out. that was the whole design idea. also green. i dont think too deeply about these things, he's entirely a joke character.

The M Crew, Moss, Marble, and Media are actually mostly three colors. green, purple, and orange. Moss is Purple with green clothes, Marble is Green with orange clothes, and Media is Orange with purple clothes. the intent is to make them look fine on their own, but also like a fun group when put together. Media is supposed to look simplistic but kinda punk. (the end result is them looking like a bouncer at a concert but thats okay lol.) Moss is supposed to have a similar outfit to what i usually wear. letterman jacket, combat boots, ripped jeans. Marble.. marble was a struggle and a half and i dont like her outfit at all. she looks like she got a witch costume from spirit halloween and called it good, so i have to fix that.

Does your oc have any notable skills or good personality traits? Why did you give them those traits? Why do they exist in-universe?

hm. Raide is good at most forms of art. i gave them that skill because im a jack of all trades, and my oc's are almost always an extension of myself. Raide is a good artist in universe because she loves art a lot, and doesnt want to be a royal guard anyway, so why not try Every type of art while he finds out what they want to do? right?

Calen is good at mixing potions, and is pretty charismatic. honestly hes had these since being created so i dont know why he has them. as for in universe explaination: potions are his job, so hes been trained on how to make them(and he Has to know how to make potions.. because they keep him alive..) . charisma is also job related. hes a merchant of many wares (potions are just the ones he makes himself.), so he's gotten pretty good at being charming but honest. it helps people buy his shit.

this got long lmao- and those two are the only ones i could think of answers for quickly(they may or may not be my fav oc's of mine...) so if you wanna ask about other beans feel free!!

[candyradium]

sea of thieves ships make me sad, but like, in the way that you get when you see unhealthy cat breeds. like. holy shit where are the shrouds. where are the staysails. actually where are the stays in general. there should be ratlines but instead there are ladders and they aren't even on all of the masts. who combined the clewlines and sheets what is wrong with you. do any of them even have jibs. halyards. sails past an upper topsail or a t'gallant. anything. who is breeding these ships i want to speak to the person in charge

[badolmen]

Few things make me feel happy when I think of humanity as a whole, but there is nothing comparable to the feeling of existential and childish joy I feel seeing people doing the things they love.

They’re so passionate! Enthusiastic! Enamored and excited! The way their eyes light up and their faces relax and the twitches of restrained movement because they don’t want to rush through whatever it is but they’re just so dang happy they can’t help it!

[cinefairy]

HOW TO STEP INTO THE MINDSET OF A POWERFUL MANIFESTOR:

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧*:･ﾟ✧･ﾟ:

take this new year as a tool to start afresh, turn over a new leaf and enter the new year..as a powerful bad bitch who can manifest anything they want so instantly and effectively. stepping into the mindset of a powerful manifestor is something that WE can all do. never underestimate your power and your strength.

・❥・HOW?

by realising everything that you want, you can have. there is no limit to what you can and cant have, you are the creator of your life. what you want you can have, you have the power to give to yourself. with the law of assumption its IMPOSSIBLE TO NOT GET YOUR DESIRES! when you want something the only key to get it is to: PERSIST IN THE ASSUMPTION THAT ITS YOURS.

SAY IT WITH ME (either in your head or out loud)

“I MANIFEST QUICKLY AND EASILY”

SAY IT WITH CONVICTION! SAY IT WITH CONFIDENCE!

“DOUBTS CAN NEVER STOP ME FROM GETTING MY DESIRES”

“NOTHING WILL EVER STOP ME FROM ACHIEVING MY GOALS IN LIFE”

・❥・UNDERSTAND YOUR POWER

understand that you are a GOD. a god in your reality, you have the right to change anything you want within it, you are the artist and you hold the brush. the brush doesn’t hold you, no one has power over you. it is time to create the life you truly deserve. it is time to stop the second-guessing and the feeling of our mind getting the best of us. YOU CONTROL YOUR MIND! YOUR MIND DOESNT CONTROL YOU. YOU CALL ALL THE SHOTS.

when doubts start to happen that is okay and thats completely normal. we all have doubts. you don’t always have to view them in a negative light- just let them pass when you get one instead of fighting it, your doubts don’t manifest unless you give them the power to manifest.

・❥・SELF CONCEPT

self concept has literally benefited me in so many ways! the reason why i truly believe self concept is important is not just because of manifestation, ofc there are the manifestation benefits (quicker manifestations, less doubts, spiralling, more confidence in manifesting abilities) but theres also general benefits in life like more confidence, less anxiety, optimistic views in life and more.

ever since establishing my self concept ive gotten even free stuff because of it and a lot of compliments, my whole life has changed. focusing on self concept isn’t a waste of time!!!!

AFFS TO USE (OPTIONAL) affs are mine

• i have the best self concept in the world

• i am always confident in all my manifestations

• everything in my life is so easy for me

• i love my life

• every aspect in life feels like a dream

• people are blessed to be in my presence

• people talk to me with such respect and kindness

• people view me as a nice person

• i am wealthy, pretty, sexy and smart (duh)

• its so crazy how everything i think of comes to me. i am that powerful for real

• me and my mind are so powerful

• literally all i could ever ask for is MINE

• my life is so amazing im so grateful

• i become prettier and prettier with every single breath i take

・❥・THE WAY YOU VIEW MANIFESTATION MATTERS

if you view manifestation as a JOB and you keep stressing about it, worrying or you just look at it as a negative perspective you are only creating more worries for yourself and none of us want that. manifestation is a gateway of opportunities to come through! if you view manifestation as hard or impossible-. you are only bringing yourself more stress and more hardships that you have to go through when you don’t! make manifestation more easy and simplistic for yourself.

・❥・START TRUSTING YOURSELF MORE

yeah its great to learn and venture in law of assumption and the posts these great blogs have to offer..BUT stop depending on them! deep down you know what to do, deep down you know all you have to assume it IS DONE. start taking the LEAP OF FAITH.

“each person is born with infinitive power against which no earthly force is the slightest significance” - Neville Goddard.

THE 3D, THE PEOPLE AROUND YOU HAVE NO POWER OVER YOU. SO TAKE THE LEAP OF FAITH, START TRUSTING YOURSELF TO MAKE THE RIGHT CHOICES AND JUST DO IT.

just do it, whats the worst that can happen? nothing bad can happen because you control everything. stop expecting failure. you cannot fail.

“If you assume success and persist in that assumption you cannot fail, that is the law” - Neville Goddard. 

・❥・MOTIVATION

YOU CAN DO IT!! YOU ARE ALMIGHTY, YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL, YOU ARE STRONG! never cut yourself short and never underestimate yourself. what you want isn’t impossible. ITS POSSIBLE. everything is possible, never compare yourself to others. be your own amazing individual self.

[pandemique]

hI!! i love your art and was wondering if you could make a tutorial showing how you paint stuff? only if you can! it's just really pretty !!

hi nonnie! thats very flattering !! i’m sorry i dont think i’ll be very helpful bc i’m a mega noob as well :D but i’ll try my very best <3

my process is very tailored for speed instead of quality (oops soz LOL) so i do suggest this for if u have short doodle breaks ⬇️⬇️⬇️

thumbnailing (for comics) -> lines (sketch who?) -> bucket tool/color drop in the base color -> color in the lines -> one multiply layer for a “base” shadow (in the vid below its purple!) -> one (1) render/paint layer a.k.a lawless no man’s land

full rendering process & more general painting tips below the cut‼️

NOTE: i’ll be focusing more on traditional/fundamental tips for stylized art because i’m sure there’s a much more effective way in digital. I truly do only use one normal layer for render... i think this is bc before i made this blog, my only prior experience in drawing is middle school art class, so all i know is traditional painting on one layer.... pray i can answer this again in the future with something smarter lmao

🌺 MY PAINT PROCESS

1. Choose a color scheme!

It doesn’t have to be set in stone like below, but i at least keep in mind the color range i’d like to use depending on what i want to convey (ex. soft pastels for soft fluff, or warm colors for happy vibes). I try to be as limited as possible for base colors because I tend to go ham when painting, you’ll see later AHAHA

2. Base coloring + Base shadow

Base -> bucket tool in the color scheme (I know other artists are against this but when i discovered the bucket tool in digital art I immediately divorced manual coloring i’m sorry i loved you tho bae) (this is why my style and lines are simplistic as they are, so the color drop works!)

Base shadow -> in theory, warm-colored light creates cool-colored shadows and vice versa. because i’m a fluff addict i mainly use warmer light, so i like using blue/purple as the shadow. generally u can’t go wrong with complementary colors!! (yellow light & purple shadows / orange light & blue shadows).

I make a new multiply layer (decreased opacity just bc i like things soft okay) and clip it on the base layer, then block in the areas i think would get blocked from the light.

3. Color in the lines!

for simplistic styles i swear this works wonders. i just clip a layer to the lineart and manually color the lines with a darker but more saturated version of the base color. it just tends to look more dead i guess with low saturation lol (ex. u can see above i use both peach and red or pink for lines of skin, i guess it implies the blood under the skin too. or something :D)

4. RENDERRRR

when i’m not in a rush i just paint things completely (and mindlessly), but here are the things i almost always do:

line the shadows with a saturated color! i’m not sure this is common but i love it lol, in almost all my doodles just check the shadows—on the edges, there’s bound to be a wild color :D (usually its the light color, shadow color or a color scheme color but sometimes i’m just like boY do i loVe piNk)

my art major friend told me about saturated colors on desaturated bases and my life was changed forever lol. u can see below even when my base is very grayyy, my rendering is very gay :D ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

make the shadows darker where i think they should be darker. usually i can just colorpick from that darker, saturated lineart color!

if it’s a more realistic piece i usually make the highlights lighter, but in simple doodles i find it unnecessary, and i dont like how light/white it looks :( i tend to just make the areas exposed to light more saturated

color in the rebound light~ in reality there’s usually not only one primary light source, at least there’d be secondary light from where light bounces off objects. in art we just emphasize that! so in large shadow areas, or in areas close to other objects/colors, i like to ‘splash’ other colors on

yeah this part is less intuitive for beginners and u have to learn a grasp on the concepts over time, like for lighting and structure. values can be more important than color, so i do suggest learning shading first before coloring, but only if u like (u can always be like me and just pull up references when u dont get how the light would fall on some materials :>). i have more general paint tips below! don’t give up okay, i believe in u nons, we’re all still in the eternal learning process together ( •̀ᄇ• ́)ﻭ✧

5. OOOOHHH SHINY ✨🤩

this step is just me being mesmerized by how easy it is to play with lighting in digital. i play around with the layer settings (multiply for shadow, overlay for light, and often try out the other settings too!). my favorite effect is the highlight glow thing, where u just make a copy layer of the highlights below the original layer, and blur it slightly so it looks like glow ✨✨🤩 overpriced acrylic could never

6. COLOR ADJUST / EDIT

Truthfully i usually skip this step, but my more pro friends really vouch for it!! i think definitely an incredible thing with digital is that u can edit proportions and even color after you’re done. i think they usually use like the curves adjustment layer in photoshop until they get colors they like, but for me, well, in a reaally diligent day i like to slap on the “auto” fliter in the iphone’s photos edit button lmaoooo

🌺 GENERAL PAINTING TIPS

learn basic theory: i think theres free courses everywhere online, but heres a few things u might like to have a basic understanding of: color, perspective, shape language, lighting, composition. don’t sweat it too much tho, it should be fun to explore the concepts!

and for drawing hoomans: proportion, gesture, expression, and veery basic anatomy. i find that overall forms are so much more important to learn than like detailed anatomy bc u can always look it up lol

but remember, u mostly want to learn the rules so u know better ways to break them :)

uuuuse manyyyyy referencessss every time u draww!

^this includes other people’s art — when u see good stuff, figure out why u like it and apply it to ur own art

get feedback!!!!

draw tons!!! brainrot helps !! ;D

aaand thank u for coming to my ted talk! sorry for the ramble nonnie, i hope u got something out of this lol

[paragonrobits]

What do you think about the sudden influx of openly expressed racism in the Tolkien and broader fantasy fandoms following the start of press for Amazon’s new Middle Earth show?

When i saw that there was a new trailer for something coming up in Tolkien-inspired works (that I haven't seen, since I'll admit I am SOMEWHAT pessimistic about them not really understanding Tolkien's themes and I worry a lot about them trying to make something tonally more similar to Game Of Thrones and other grimdark series because its popular, and LOTR functions interestingly as a sort of unbuilt trope directly countering all that) I had wondered what some of the fandom response to it might be.

I'm sad to hear that its apparently a wave of bigotry and racism being revealed in the fantasy and Tolkien-specific fandoms! Like, REALLY sad and disappointed. But at the same time, I'm honestly not surprised.

It's the vocal part of the same people who routinely seem to throw a fit whenever diversity, broader thought and any kind of 'hey maybe we sohuld make this a little more nuanced' shows up in fantasy in general. These are the people who just LOSE THEIR MINDS and its just.

It's really GODDAMNED ANNOYING seeing these troglodytes still in the hobby! And that's an insult to the concept of troglodytes. The morlocks didn't do anything to be associated with these reprobates.

I'd be lying, of course, if I tried to pretend the fantasy community in general hasn't had a problem with people like this for a long, LONG time. They're always present, mostly at the margins, and being the loudest voices of complaint. They also seem uniquely ill suited towards an environment like LOTR (which is actually rather interesting in a lot of ways such as positing humans being inherently flawed in a lot of ways that are ultimately self destructive in the grand scheme of themes, and a somewhat gloomy motif of 'things will gradually decline' in ways that outright oppose the power fantasy people like this obsess over).

I'm reminded of how for a while on Youtube, I kept seeing recommmends for a backwards-sounding channel that kept complaining about a player that was annoyed with orcs being portrayed as mindless beasts and didn't like killing them, and similar things during that period where you kept seeing the worst of the roleplaying hobby throwing a fit over the growth of nuance in the settings so you got things like 'orcs are not mindless beasts' and 'the humanoid beings are not universally Good people' so you got the weird experience of people being mad about there being MORE nuance, but that all says something about them. at worst this is blatant bigotry being shown through metaphor. At best they're whining about their hobby not being simplistic.

So broadly I'm really disappointed to hear about this initial response but again, I'm not surprised that its THAT stripe of fandom being loud and annoying about it.

Ironically the first i heard about this Tolkien stuff was people praising a female dwarf portrayed by a POC actress, and the thing they complained about? They missed Tolkien lore and stated that a female dwarf SHOULD have a beard! "THEY GOT SO CLOSE AND MISSED IT AT THE LAST STEP", essentially. And there's something to be said about the producers trying to be inclusive and diverse, but ultimately shying away from showing non-traditional feminity. I would say that it could also be seen as the creative types here missing what distinguishes LOTR from its imitators and those that were inspired by it (where dwarf women like this are pretty common, like Dragon Age).

I guess this means I'm curating my experience pretty well that I'm not seeing the worst of it! I think its likely that its always there, waiting for an opportunity to jump and expose the terrible opinions beneath the surface. Tragic and a sickening thing but thats why it behooves one to fight it as much as possible!

[calpalsworld]

Minecraft: the N00b Adventures - The Minecraft Storymode that Should’ve Been?

When I was encouraged to watch a minecraft animation because of its iconic villain named Gaylord_Steambath, I thought I was going to have to witness a Futuristic-Hub-esque CGI animation featuring a large cast of copyrighted characters such as freddy fazbear and spongebob. (You know what type of minecraft animation I’m talking about.) When I discovered it was actually an ugly looking 2D puppet animation hosted on n*wgrounds I thought I was going to have to witness a nauseating, offensive mess. But it was actually pretty okay.

Maybe I just feel so kind towards this series since I had low standards for it starting off. But thankfully, nothing offensive happened because it is pretty much a PG animation for babies who love minecraft.... besides a couple jokes and the fact that Milky_Dad was constantly doing drugs.... And the fact that theres a character named Milky_Dad..... (Best character tho I would love to study him! Very compelling!)

The animation was a mixed bag but overall good for a dumb webseries. The way the characters looked grew on me. Sometimes a kinda cool shot would happen during action scenes. The backgrounds were nice, although the characters were stiff and unexpressive. Honestly it was just exciting to see a Minecraft animation in simplistic 2D, rather than oversaturated hyper-rendered 3D. (Sometimes N00b Adventures would have things that weren’t 2D. Its mixed media. Its cultured. Its complex? Its art? Okay?)

The best part of the series was honestly the story. I expected it to be a disjointed lol XD random mess, but it was actually a 28-mini-epsiode Minecraft Epic about 3 kind-hearted noobs on their quest to free a hardcore server from the tyranny of griefer-turned-admin and rich bastard, Gaylord_Steambath, all the while  learning how to git gud and ultimately, SURVIVE.....! It was somewhat episodic, with different “arcs” as the noobs encountered threats like the Wither, Hackers, and Herobrine. But the overarching plot would always progress, since Gaylord_Steambath relentlessly trolled the 3 noobs throughout their travels.

My only big critique was that out of the three noobs, Pooplooser_69 and N00bly were extremely boring. They weren’t funny people, nothing funny would ever happen to them, and their personalities were dull. Comedy solely relied upon Fart_Garfunkel for some reason, who was *sometimes* actually funny, but became slightly annoying, as he was THE ONLY NOOB who ever did ANYTHING comedic. They could’ve at least made obvious jokes about N00bly being a dumb noob, or Poop being too serious! Come ON.

BUT THE ONE THING I COULDN’T STOP THINKING WAS.... Why is this better than Minecraft Storymode!!!?????? Sorry, thats a random comparison, but I couldnt stop thinking it. N00b Adventures seems to understand the culture and appeal of Minecraft much better than Minecraft Storymode. Characters had names like Fart. There was a guy with a green checkered bandana and emo hair-- AN ESSENTIAL STAPLE OF MINECRAFT CULTURE. They had cameos from actual Minecraft youtubers. The story was about how much griefers suck and are ANNOYING! It focused on what's appealing about Minecraft: the things you actually encounter in the game, and the WILDERNESS SURVIVAL. I wish Minecraft Storymode wasn’t so complicated, and was literally just a survival scenario about some idiots living (and potentially dying) in the canonical minecraft world while facing against asshole griefers... like N00b Life.... And for HEAVENS SAKE! Put a CHECKERED BANDANA in there!!!!

[katatonicimpression]

One of the things I love about Shinobi objectively being stupid and weak and lazy and ineffectual is that I feel so many abuse narratives focus on showing the victim ISN'T the things the abuser said and THAT'S why they shouldn't have been abused, whereas with Shin yeah he IS these things and guess what STILL DOESN'T DESERVE ABUSE. I don't think that was the authorial intent, the text is rarely at all sympathtic to Shin, but it's how I choose to handle it. That yeah, he is a big stupid screwup and vain and obnoxious and objectively not a good person and still 110% worthy of sympathy and compassion and should never have been hurt because there's never any justification for that. SORRY FOR THE RAMBLE just I in general love Shin being dumb bc it's funny but also this!

YOU'RE SO RIGHT! I enjoy making fun of him but it's worth saying this!

I'd also add that, if we set aside the times he's written as (or coded as) perv-y - those moments are 100% there for racist and biphobic reasons - his other character flaws are clearly there as a result of Sebastian. They're not the "reason" for the abuse, it's the exact opposite.

And yeah the framing is weird because it's not at all actually sympathetic to him, but also very reluctant to have him actually be the biggest baddie in the room at any point and will constantly have shit things happen to him while he achieves no real villainy.

I think it's mostly coming from a (racist) desire to emasculate the character at every turn, but it winds up making him just not seem that bad and oh my god this got out of hand have a "keep reading"

OK right by my reckoning there are only 2 shin appearances where he's actually the main villain. The one where he kidnaps Warren and Betsy, and the x-force one that is a blatant rehash of it.

The betsy and Warren issue dedicates itself to just listing his damage and, while firmly not on his side, its still a pretty sympathetic take... or is it?

Maybe this was supposed to be an own and they just failed at that.

The x-force one is much more simplistic. He doesn't really get pathos, kidnaps some children and actually murders someone directly with his powers (for I think the first and only time?). It's genuinely ooc how he's actually a straight forward, mostly competent villain here.

So thats TWO issues where he's actually the main bad guy and one of them is a deep exploration of his trauma.

His other appearances are either a story where he's in opposition to other villains, or he's just fucking about (e.g. marauders). With the former, it's that desire to emasculate him again. He's almost always shown as a complete mess next to these other, scarier villains.

Shout out to this very brief cameo where he apparently does some behind the scenes scheming with the Mandarin. Apparently he can be a competent villain so long as he's off the page.

But the rest of the time he's:

Failing at being a super villain in japan

Ignoring Cordelia Frost's weird plans

Being ghosted by the British hellfire club

Failing at being an Upstart

Playing chess with some guy

et alia...

None of this makes me hate him I'm sorry.

The absolute weirdest one framing wise is the storm thing. Shin is coded as a predator. He invites ororo for dinner and drugs her drink. Coding-wise, they're not being subtle here.

But then we immediately find out that it's Candra's plan AND that she's also drugging/otherwise manipulating Shinobi. AND it's implied that they have a physical relationship. So... that's not consensual. It literally can't be.

So, in an issue where he's unambiguously coded as a date r*pist, he's implicitly being sexually abused.

And like..... um???? What am I supposed to take from that?

My best guess it's that it's a 90s "haha man under a woman's control how pathetic of him" but like.. I am incapable of reading it like that.

It's just throughout: this character is intended to be seen as bad but for toxic, racist and queer-phobic reasons, but if you read him without that lens, it's just: "Oh, he's kind of a dumb jerk I guess. He should probably quit drinking."

Basically, if you think a man being weak and ineffectual makes him worthy of scorn, then he'll come across as villainous.... which is kind of ironic I guess.

...........................

..um so this got off topic from the original ask. I just started typing about how his characters framed and it became a whole thing sorry.

[fagwolf-archive]

benrey and gman species headcanons!!!!

so i was thinking about benreys abilities and as i wrote out headcanons i decided u know what. i think benrey and gman are the same species. so here are some thoughts about their species:

- massive eldritch horrorterrory creatures, literally incomprehensible to the human brain. youd probably die if you saw their true forms, your brain would just overload and shut down

- so to exist in the science teams universe, they make themselves appear humanlike juzt so they dont accidentally kill people. also just for practicalities sake - way easier to walk through a door if youre human sized hsjfkhsdjk

- ofc they only LOOK human - theyre still all fucked up and monstery and can shapeshift. gman is older than benrey and has pretty much full control at all times over his form, benrey meanwhile struggles a bit to maintain it and forgets stuff about humans - like that their limbs dont bend that way, or their heads cant turn 180 degrees, or that they only have one row of teeth

- they are a mainly Predator Species and so a lot of their biology fits this!!!:

- bioluminescent eyes act as lure like anglerfish - and also sweet voice! ill go a bit more into sweetvoice in a moment but in hunting context, its used as pretty, hypnotic lure for prey and also to calm prey and induce docility and prevent fighting back (benrey doesnt rlly hunt so he just uses it to calm down gordon when he thinks hes too mad)

- benrey in particular’s “huh? whuh?” thing is cause natural predator instinct to hyperfocus on one thing coupled with Neurodivergency means he finds it really difficult to switch conversation topics or pay attention to multiple things at once.

- i thought a lot about communication as well!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:

- their species has 3 basic forms of communication, or at least those are the 3 ive thought about:

- 1 is nonverbal - thats a LOT of their communication. body language, certain types of blinking or finger movement etc communicates tons. just like a species like a cat or rabbit.

- 2 is how they talk to their young. again, like cats, eldritches have a reserved form of communication (like meowing) for their babies. this is telepathy - they use it to talk directly and comfortingly to their kids and to immediately figure out what they need. this has also evolved into how they talk to humans - like cats meow at humans cause they see them as big babies.

- and eldritches dont actually speak english, they telepathically convert their language to whatever the humans mother tongue is, projecting the language straight into their head. annoying comparison, but like the tardis’ telepathic field in dr who.

- added onto this, this is why benreys english gets worse when hes emotional. e.g: “im a great cool, so now i gonna be bad”. he struggles more to keep up the telepathy when hes upset or ecstatic, so his english sounds more distorted.

- and ALSO benrey forgets as well that humans cant communicate telepathically. hell respond to something someone thought or read their emotions and react accordingly/get them what they need and he’ll be SO confused when theyre like “wtf how did you do that”

- 3 is SWEETVOICE!!! this is a big part of all assets of their language - its a simple ingrained way to communicate simple emotions and greetings etc, like “nice to meet you” “i like you” “i am feeling angry, dont talk to me” etc.

- gman doesnt use it as much because its generally considered a more simplistic and childish way to talk, as its the first way children learn to communicate outside of telepathy to express their basic emotions. benrey uses it a lot because he Likes It!!!!!!!! it easily expresses what hes trying to say.

- this is also why tommy knows how to read sweetvoice - personally i believe hez human and was adopted by gman but gman still taught him how to read sweetvoice. as hes adopted he cant do it himself, but hes the one who understands benreys communication the best cause he was raised by an eldritch

- the skeletons!! eldritches can create entities to assist them, theyre not living creatures they only exist while the species wants them to. benreys are the skeletons - they help him in the final battle and everything.

- benreys also a younger, weaker eldritch than gman is, and uses his skeletons in a slightly different way. the skeleton that asks gordon for his passport isnt ACTUALLY benrey, its an entity benrey has created while hes temporarily dead to project himself out of while his actual form is rebuilding itself in Limbo.

- i believe the whole thing gman was saying about benrey needing to be contained and everything after he was “killed” is just cause hes an abnormally immature/emotional eldritch, and is pretty outcasted and chaotic as far as things go. like usually these creatures are out being Space Diplomats or apex predators or smth meanwhile benrey just likes Being Around Humans And Playing Video Games :] hes looked down upon a bit

[trashcreatyre]

I'm gonna explain one of my TMA playlists bc I've been wanting to do that for several months, and how else am I supposed to procrastinate my animatic project at one in the morning?

(here's the link to the playlist bc I think its pretty slappin')

General:

Body Terror Song By AJJ-

I know that it could technically be a flesh song, but I feel like its a bit more vague than that? if that makes sense?

The Afternoon By Lemon Demon-

there's gonna be a lot of Lemon Demon songs in this lol- This one is also pretty vague, but for some reason it kinda reminds me of Michael specifically? I don't 100% know how to describe it.

thrifted youth By dalynn-

Most of the descriptions/reasonings in the general section are pretty simplistic and vague huh? I guess it just kinda fits the vibe? I might be saying that for a lot of the general ones-

Aurora Borealis By Lemon Demon-

this one reminds me of the season five, kinda feels like a jmart song. (also you'll probably notice that there's not much in the ship theme in this playlist. I like to keep my ship playlists separate from my more general ones, don't know why.)

Under My Skin By Jukebox The Ghost-

just kinda fits the vibe y'know? other than that I don't really know.

Turn the Lights Off By Tally Hall-

i can't actually remember why I put this one specifically- that's a bit unfortunate-

When He Died By Lemon Demon-

This one mostly just fits the vibe, makes me think about the really old Victorian era statements.

Ancient Aliens By Lemon Demon-

again, fits the vibe.

She Doesn't Sleep By Anthony Amorim-

Feels like a random statement tbh. also reminds me of Not!Sasha too.

Nightmare Fuel By Lemon Demon-

funky song- fits the vibe- I don't know what more I can say-

Everybody Loves Me by OneRepublic-

I don't remember actually???? I think It was an Elias one??? but thinking about it now that doesn't really make much sense???? I'm gonna keep it tho, fits the vibe, at least it does to me.

Bloody Nose By Jack Conte-

fits the vibe :)

Christmas Kids By Roar-

I think I saw an animatic to this one time? now I can only think of the season one archival staff,,,, my beloveds,,,,

La nuit en matin By OH MU-

imma be honest, I have no idea what this one's actually about, but It lowkey reminds me of the intro music during end of season three- y'know, the clown vibes :D

9 to 5 By Dolly Parton-

Archival staff moment

American Healthcare By Penelope Scott-

I guess it could technically be seen as an End themed one? but I put it on bc I felt like it fit the vibes (are you getting sick of reading vibes? i'm getting sick of typing it)

Butch 4 Butch By Rio Romeo-

mostly just the rat filled piano line,,,,,, and also it fits the vibes to me.

Oblivion By Grimes-

Kinda feels like a statement?? In a way?

Murders By Miracle Musical-

the vibes. hopefully thats the last time i type that for this-

oh yeah woo yeah, we're onto the specific Entities now B) lets start with the one that probably has the most, if not, it sure feels like it-

The Spiral:

Spiral Eyes By Rewenge-

yeahhhh,,,, I know it doesn't really fit the vibes all that well, But the title fits and I like it so-

The Distortionist By Ghost and Pals-

this one is SUPER obvious, but it fits REALLY well in my mind.

Out of Her Head (Outerlude) [From The Film Possibly in Michigan] By Korban Baxter-

I can literally picture this one- I lowkey wanna do an animatic of this one one day.

A Crow's Trial By Vane Lily-

OKAY- so this last one is because it's the song from an absolutely GORGEOUS animation/animatic by Akidachi on YouTube, I ADORE this animation. please watch it omg-

again, I'm like, 90% sure that The Spiral has the most songs on this playlist, definitely not a bias or anything. next up is the mf uhhhh-

The Corruption:

Spiral of Ants By Lemon Demon-

no explanation needed.

Maggot By Slutever-

Mostly just the name, but it's a good song too so-

Sick On Seventh Street By Sarah and the Safe Word-

fits the vibe title and actual song wise.

in retrospect under my skin probably could be here-

The Web:

Redesign Your Logo (Bonus Track) By Lemon Demon-

Feels like a very web song,,,

Boris The Spider By The Who-

Spider,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Spider Dance By Toby Fox-

Yes,,, like from undertale,,,,,,,

i think thats it for the web (i swore there were more,,,,)

The Lonely:

Nobody By Mitski-

C'mon, you didn't think I WOULDN'T put this one on, did you?

This December By Ricky Montgomery-

idk what it is exactly about this one, just,,,, feels correct?

Blue Jay Way By The Beatles-

MANNNNNNN- i love this song, my mom hates it- that's unrelated- but I always just feel like there's fog or like, an eerie sea, or something- while listening to it. it feels very lonely-

I'm a Member of the Midnight Crew (1909) By Eddie Morton-

I have no idea why spotify suggested this song to me, but I will never not find it funny. Anyway- reminds me of the crew on Peter's ship :)

The Stranger:

Rattlesnake By Kabaret Sybarit-

Idk, feels like smth Nikola would sing at jon- idk how else to explain it-

A Mask of My Own Face By Lemon Demon-

pretty self explanatory lolll

The Slaughter:

War Pigs By Black Sabbath-

war.

The Hunt:

The Hunter By Slaves-

maybe this one is because it's because it's litterally called the hunter, and that they say hunter a bunch, but it is fun to listen to-

Teeth By 8 Graves-

I cannot remember my reasoning at this current moment-

The Flesh:

Body By Mother Mother-

the lyrics do be fittin doe

The Dark:

Everything Goes Dark By The Hoosiers-

i mean- everything goes dark- what more do you want me to say-

Dr.Sunshine Is Dead By Will Wood and the Tapeworms-

i think its mostly the song's vibe and the title.

The End:

The Trick to life By The Hoosiers-

the trick to life is not to get too attached to it.

Memento Mori: the most important thing in the world By Will Wood-

remember death.

YOOO OKAY NOW WE'RE ON THE ONES THAT I HAVE ACTUAL THINGS TO SAY ABOUT NOW- at least for the most part-

Characters:

i think i'm gonna go from least to most for this- (spoilers, Jon has the most ones because I care him)

Cryptid Hunt- Demo By Averno, Sushi Soucy-

this one makes me think of the WTGFs,,,,,

You're at the Party (Bonus Track) By Lemon Demon-

makes me think about Micheal Shelley,,,,,,,

Saint Bernard By Lincoln-

Alice "daisy" Toner moment-

Mary By The Happy Fits-

mary keay,,,,,,

there used to be a gerry one too, but the more I heard it in the context of the playlist and him, It just didn't fit,,,,,

Ew it's Elias/jonah time-

The Fine Print By The Stupendium-

capitalism- jk- kinda- Idk, just feels like it fits because he really just kinda,,, doesn't care about his employees-

How Bad Can I Be? from the lorax-

I had to-

Boss 3 from the terraria soundtrack-

Listen- I don't know why- but- it has elias/jonah vibes- the vibes are fowl, but the song is good.

Ruler of Everything By Tally Hill-

Panopticon/eyepocolypes time-

Ayooo it's jon time- I really hope I can write out my thoughts in a way that makes any kind of sense- /foreshadowing

A Sadness Runs Through Him By The Hoosiers-

Goddddd,,,,, he's just kinda filled with sadness and survivors guilt, just like, all the time huh?

Home By Cavetown-

the lyrics are just- very him- like- I just gjbdjgsflkjns-

Broken Crown By Mumford & Sons-

frick- the foreshadowing was accurate- the best I can describe it is that the lyrics just???? y'know??? hhh why am I like this sometimes-

Sweet HIbiscus Tea By Penelope Scott-

i'm willing to bet that he never wanted to be the main character-

Honey I'm Home By Ghost and Pals-

I saw a Jon centric animatic to this one time- I can't for the life of me remember who by, But everytime I hear the moth lines, my brain goes ":0" Because I remember there was a time when people kept drawing moth jon- I don't know where that came from but I thought it was very cool.

Who Are You, Really? By Mikky Ekko-

I'm like- actually starting to get frustrated with how poorly im articulating my thoughts right now- this just isn't funny anymore-

Sleep By My Chemical Romance-

I'm not actually sure why for this one- I just remeber putting on my black parade CD, hearing this, and being like, "damn, that do kinda be jon tho-"

I hope you enjoyed my ramblings- tbh, all this sounded and read out better in my head. My words might not make sense, but I do like how the playlist is. also im very tired, maybe this would've been written better if I wasn't struggling to keep my eyes open lol. I'm gonna fall asleep now- or maybe i'll post a spiral themed doodle dump again, who knows. I don't know.

[adorpheus]

on fujoshi and fetishization

Lately, more and more, both here on tumblr and on other sites, I keep seeing people spew unfiltered hatred at fujoshi - that is, women who like mlm content such as gay fanfic and fanart featuring men with other men. And I don’t mean like a specific type of fujoshi, like the ones who are genuinely being weird about it, but just like a general hatred for girls (but especially straight identifying girls) who express love for gay romance.

I hate to break this to you all, but women (including straight women!) actually are allowed to like mlm fanfiction and fanart, even enthusiastically so. A woman simply expressing her love of gay fanfic, even if it is in kind of a cringey way or a way that you personally don’t like, is NOT automatically fetishization.

I’ve been on the receiving end of fetishization for my entire life, from a very young age, as many black and brown folx have, so I consider myself pretty well acquainted with how it works. Fetishization isn’t just like, being really into drawings of boys kissing, or whatever the fuck y’all are trying to imply on this god forsaken site. 

Fetishization is complicated imo, and can encompass a lot of things, such as (but not limited to):

1 - dehumanization, e.g. viewing a group of people as sexual objects who exist purely for entertainment purposes, rather than acknowledging them as actual people who deserve respect and rights

and

2 - projecting certain assumptions onto said people based on their race/sexuality/whatever is being fetishized. These assumptions are often, but not always, sexual in nature (like the idea that black people in general are more sexual than other races, etc etc etc).

I’m going to use myself as an example to illustrate my point. Please note this isn’t the best or most nuanced example, but it is the most simplistic. A white person finding me attractive and respectfully appreciating my black features as part of what makes me beautiful is not, on its own, fetishization. A white person finding me attractive solely or mostly because I’m a PoC is now in fetishization territory. Similarly, assuming I’m dominant because of my blackness (like saying “step on me mommy” and shit like that) is hella fetishistic. 

That being said, theres definitely a difference between how fetishization works in real life with real people, and how it shows up in fandom. 

Fetishization manifests in many different ways in fandom, but most commonly on the mlm side of things, I personally see it appear as conservative (or centrist) women who love the idea of two men together, but don’t actually like gay people, and don’t necessarily think LGBT+ people deserve rights (or “special treatment” as its sometimes dog whistled). These women view queer men as sexual objects for entertainment rather than an actual group of people who deserve to be protected from systemic oppression. I’ve noticed that they often don’t even think of the men they “ship” together as actually being gay, and may even express disgust at the idea of a character in an mlm ship being headcanon’d gay. In case its not obvious, this is pretty much exactly the same way a lot of cishet men fetishize lesbians (they see “lesbian” as a porn category, rather than like, what actual LGBT people think of when we read the word lesbian). There’s a pretty popular viral tweet thread going around where someone explains seeing this trend of conservative women who like mlm stuff, and I have also personally witnessed this phenomenon myself in more than one fandom. 

The funny thing is, maybe its just me buuuut.... The place I see this particular kind of fetishization happen most is not in the anime/BL fandom, from which the term fujoshi originates - I actually see these type of women way way more in western fandom spaces like Supernatural, Harry Potter, and Hannibal. I can’t stress this enough, there’s a shocking amount of people who are like, straight up trump supporters in these fandoms. If you want to experience it, try joining a Hannigram or Destiel group on facebook and you will probably encounter one eventually especially if you happen to be living through a major historical event. Like these women probably wouldn’t even be considered “fujoshi”, because that term doesn’t really apply to them given they aren’t in the BL/anime fandom, yet they’re the ones I personally see actually doing the most harm.

Of course this isn’t the ONLY kind of fetishizing woman in the mlm/BL world, there are other ways fetishization shows up, but this is the most toxic kind that I see.

A girl just being really into BL or whatever may be “cringe” to you, or she may be expressing her love for BL in a “cringey” way, but a straight woman really enjoying BL is not, on its own, somehow inherently fetishization. Yes, sometimes teenage girls act kind of cringe about how much they like BL and that might be annoying to you, but its not necessarily ~problematic~. 

That being said, IT NEEDS BE REMARKED that a lot of the “fujoshi” that you all hate so deeply, are actually closeted trans men or nonbinary people who haven’t yet come to terms with their gender identity, or are otherwise just NOT cishet. I know because I was one of these closeted people for years, and I honestly think tumblr and the cultural obsession around purity is one of the many reasons I was closeted so deeply for so long. STORYTIME LOL!!! In my early adolescence, I was a sort of proto “fujoshi”. I identified as a bi girl who was mostly attracted to men, or as most (biphobic) people called it, “practically straight”. I wrote and read “slash” fanfic and looked at as well as drew my own fanart. We didn’t use the term fujoshi back then, but that’s definitely how I could have been described. I was obsessed with yaoi, BL, whatever you want to call it, to a cringe-inducing degree. I really struggled to relate to most het romances, so when I first discovered yaoi fanfics (as we called them at the time), I fell in love and felt like I finally found the type of romance content that was made for me. I didn’t know exactly why, I just knew it hit different. LGBT+ fanart and fanfiction brought me an immense amount of joy, and I didn’t really think too hard about why.

At some point, in my early 20s, after reading lots of discourse™ here on tumblr and other places like twitter, I started to get the sinking feeling that my passion for gay fanfiction was ~problematic~. I had always felt a sense of guilt for being into mlm content, because literally anyone who found out I liked BL (especially the men I dated) shamed me for liking it all the fucking time (which btw is literally just homophobic, like can we talk about that?). In addition to THAT bullshit, now I’m seeing posts telling me that girls who like BL are cringey gross fetishists who inspire rage and should go die? 

Let me tell you, I internalized the fuck out of messages like this. I desperately wanted to avoid being ~problematic~. At the time, I thought being problematic was like the worst thing you could be. I was terrified of being “cancelled”, before canceling was even really a thing. I thought to myself, “oh my god, I’m gross for liking this stuff? I should stop.” I beat myself up over this. I wanted so badly to be accepted, and to be deemed a Good Person by the internet and society at large.

I tried to shape up and become a good ally (lmfao). I stopped writing fanfic and deleted all the ones I was working on at the time. I made a concerted effort to assimilate into cishet culture, including trying to indulge myself more deeply in the few fandoms I could find that had het content I did enjoy (Buffy, True Blood, Pretty Little Liars, etc). I would occasionally look at BL/fanfic/etc in private, but then I would repress my interest in it and not look for a while. Instead I would look at women in straight relationships, and create extremely heterosexual Couple Goals pinterest boards, and try to figure out how I could become more like these women, so I, too, could be loved someday. 

This cycle of repression lasted like eight years. Throughout it all, I was performing womanhood to the best of my ability and trying to become a woman that was worthy of being in a relationship. I went in and out of several “straight” relationships, wondering why they didn’t make me feel the way reading fanfic did. Most of all, I couldn’t figure out why straight intimacy didn’t work for me. I just didn’t enjoy it. I always preferred looking at or making gay fanfiction/fanart over actual intimacy with men in real life. 

Eventually, I stumbled upon a trans coming out video that someone I was following posted online, my egg started to crack, and to make an extremely long story short, after like 3 years of introspection and many gender panic attacks that I still experience to this day, I realized that I’m uh... MAYBE... NOT CIS..!? :|

I truly believe if I had just been ALLOWED TO LIKE GAY STUFF WITHOUT BEING SHAMED FOR IT, I probably would have realized I was trans way way sooner. Because for me, indulging in my love of gay romance and writing gay fanfic wasn’t me being a weirdo fetishist, it was actually me exploring my own gender identity. It is what helped me come to terms with being a nonbinary trans boy.

Not everyone realizes they are trans at age 2 or whatever the fuck. Sometimes you have to go through a cringey fujoshi phase and multiple existential crises to realize how fucking gay you are AND THATS FINE.

And one more thing - can we just be real here? 

A lot of anti-fujoshi sentiment is literally just misogyny. omg please realize this. Its “women aren’t allowed to enjoy things” but, like... with gay fanfics. Some of the anti-fujoshi posts I see come across my dash are clearly ppl projecting a caricature they invented in their head of a demonic fujoshi fetishist onto any woman who expresses what they consider to be a little too much enthusiasm for gay content and then using their perception of that individual as an excuse to justify their disdain for any women, especially straight women, ‘invading’ their ~oh so exclusive~ queer fandom spaces.

 god get over yrselfs this is gatekeeping by another name

idk why i spent so long writing this no one is even going to read it, does anyone even still use this site

*EDIT: HOLY SHIT WHEN DOING RESEARCH FOR THIS POST I FOUND OUT THAT Y-GALLERY IS BACK OMG!!!